Pay TV is limited and feels like it is much less than what Singapore offers. One of the channels is showing Bewitched from the 60s. No streaming. But there is Airplay and Chromecast on the TV…
Toilet paper is only 2 ply
No written guide to the hotel or anything. You have to turn on the TV to discover basic hotel info. And a QR code to see the room service menu.
The fridge is empty.
The TV remote is so old many buttons are no longer labeled, the labels have worn off.
The desk had some remnants of melted chocolate on it. There is no pen or paper – branding opportunities wasted!
Some positives: The aircon was on and set to 22. I never adjusted it. Ther room had a spaciousness with a feeling of grandeur, albeit it from the 70s
This started as a few notes intended for TripAdvisor…
Full disclaimer: I am a radical socialist writing a book about inequality and the end of capitalism. And I was a backpacker for 5 years, while my accidental instances of luxury are well short of two weeks in total. I feel ill when someone bows to me or even calls me sir.
Google flew me to a conference in Singapore and it included 3 nights at the nominally 5 star InterContinental on Middle Road, which typically costs $300 to $600 per night.
After shunning the offer to take my luggage for me, checkin was a breeze, aside from the soft sell of their frequent guest program. I got given two elevator cards, and one room card (they are between systems he said) neither of which says which they are. The cardboard card holder was not fit for purpose and broke within a day. The elevator decided to have an unorthodox layout of floor buttons, and I actually got out because I thought I was in the wrong lift – they had put 13 down the bottom.
Technology is clearly not their strong point. Instructions regarding the hotel – amenities, room service and so on, which I prefer to find in a folder, were completely missing until I turned on the TV and saw them on the home page. Something I never would have done had I known how poor the TV offerings are. The usual news and sports channels, plus some very dodgy channels, one was showing Bewitched from the 60s. You can pay $15 for a movie, but all are at least 2 years old, with Harry Potter being promoted.
There is no pen and paper, a notable omission. Unless the desk has a secret compartment. Writing that inspired me to look harder and there is a draw, with a nice little folded up map and an old school Ethernet cable. It was easy to miss.
Seemingly a feature, the TV can be heard, at a whisper, in the bathroom, via a dedicated speaker, even if the TV itself is off. Your first thought is that the neighbors have their telly up loud / the walls are thin.
The button near the door that says Do Not Disturb is non-functional, and there is no alternative, no sign to hang on the door handle.
The TV remote is so old that many of the buttons have had their labels rub off, and you have to point it precisely two feet above the screen and hold your mouth the right way for it to do its job. I was a little bit excited seeing Spotify in the menu but it is hard-wired to their bland corporate playlist. That is the closest to streaming the hotel offers.
Here’s a brief interlude – things I liked. The toiletry kits have earbuds, makeup removal pads and dental floss, plus there is a digital scale and full length mirror. There are USB ports including two right next to the bed. The bed and pillows are luxurious. The desk is office worthy, the ceiling is a nice height, and there is a sofa and cushions.
The aircon is set to 22 but that is perhaps to save money because “eco” doesn’t get a mention anywhere else during my stay. The desk bloke misheard me when I asked for the room not to be cleaned, so it is seemingly a rare request to not want them washing things every day.
The fridge is empty, they have apparently given up on having mini-bars, which I am guessing is unusual for a 5 star place. I’m thinking it is perhaps something you need to get 5 stars? There is no ice machine. The TV tells me to “please call Private Dining” to get some ice. I presume there is a fee.
Which gets me comparing the hotel with my ordinary Australian home, which has ice. Instead of my home’s 3-ply toilet paper, the hotel had un-luxurious 2-ply. The hotel toilet seat is not soft closing, which perhaps is not a thing here. And of course in this land of no chewing gum and prohibitive prices on car ownership, maybe 3-ply loo roll is forbidden.
The 30ml bottle of shower soap, and matching shampoo etc, is tiny, and insufficient for more than half a shower in what is a steamy tropical place. I purchased my own (from the handy mall next door) rather than complaining, because the little bottles fight to keep their liquid – when you release your squeeze it gets sucked back in. And of course the shower cavity is short-statured, with no room for any normal sized BYO product.
The place was clean, which was reiterated by multiple signs saying how important being clean is to them, like it is a novel concept for a hotel. Well, there was some hard to see melted chocolate all over the desk, so I guess they spot clean…
And what I would definitely change is the lack of somewhere to put my suitcase and open it. There’s lots of room, but I actually use the bed, the sofa and the desk, and that’s just one person. Some sort of foldout shelf would be wonderful.
There’s meant to be a swimming pool on the 4th floor. It is poorly signed and the door wouldn’t open for me. The breakfast buffet is standard fancy, but the food is lukewarm and I had the embarrassment of waiting for my toast to emerge from the toaster – it never did. The next day it did work but not emerge, I had to slide my hand into an already acknowledged dodgy machine. The butter, typically not a failure anywhere, was hard to open and without the incredibly obvious indicator of which corner should be opened. Shame on the hotel and the manufacturer. I ate my sausage before it lost all memory of being lukewarm while I figured out the opening. Meanwhile the streaky bacon (normally my favorite type) lost its lustre, cold, broiled (?), dead.
Yes, it is an old hotel, and yes there was COVID. But it is also a fancy chain and I expected perfection or close to it. Quality control seems to not be their thing. I suggest the CEO or manager should actually stay as a guest.
Oh yeah, almost forgot. The toilet randomly flushes. Combined with the TV whispers in the bathroom I do not recommend this hotel for anyone who believes in ghosts.
And the towel rail is not wide enough for the luxurious towel. Seriously, test your own product. Not difficult.